The Game of Life: First and Second

    

    People who say that life is not a game have obviously never played card games, dice games, poker, or Chutes and Ladders. They also have never played or paid much mind to the game Mouse Trap. They are wrong. Life is a game. Not a fair game, not a clearly defined rules game, but it is still a game. You roll the dice and take your chances.

    You might think that I am going to write about the unfairness of the game of life, but in that you would be wrong. I am not going to be writing about that at all. What I am doing is simply saying that life is a game - Because it is. That's not all it is, of course. But it is still indeed a game.

I     will admit that for some people life is more a game than it is for others. Those others don't believe themselves to be in a game, but that does not matter. It is still a game that they are part of, albeit unknowingly.

So, when people scoff and roll their eyes at me, saying very dismissively that my time spent in the virtual world of Second Life is a childish waste, is not important, because it is "just a game" and nothing done in it is real, I beg to differ.

    I know full well that one day everything I've done in the virtual world of Second Life will come to nothing. It will all become meaningless, unimportant, will dissipate and disappear, but that is no different than what will happen in my First Life: Everything I've done, accomplished, said, or written, will be forgotten. That is true for all of us, whether we believe it or not.

I live in my First Life. Yes.

    I also live in my Second Life. During the COVID pandemic I've been able to gather with people, sightsee, swim, ski, ride horses, dance, boat, fish, and more. I've designed and built landscapes, towns, and venues. I've lived outdoors most of the time, never in fear of disease or injury. While other people in my first life have been confined to their homes, stuck watching an endless stream of Netflix, I've been out dancing at a crowded concert with many other people. Which of us have lived, and which of us have simply existed? I think that I am the one who has lived.

     

      This Wednesday my Second Life wife and I will be celebrating our 4th Wedding Anniversary. We will be hosting a party at a venue that I designed and built from the ground up. There will be dancing, food, drink, wine, and of course music. We will be sharing the experience with our friends, with extended family, and some people we've never met before. Does it really matter that we are doing this virtually rather than in our first life?

    I am sure that some of our first life relatives think so. They will get onto Facebook or a Video Cam and talk dismissively to others about how Mark and Maria are playing that game again, making believe that we are married, are living a real life, that doing it in SL is actually a real thing. They will scoff, they will mock, they will dismiss. They will laugh and they will sneer. They will be doing all of that by means of Virtual Communication.

    Virtual communication is how people interact with others without being in the same room, same city, same town, or same country. Phone calls, cam calls, instant messaging, video teleconferencing, social networking, these are all forms of virtual communication. They are all also forms of virtual relationships.

        There is a long history of people who've had long distance relationships, most never actually meeting each other in person. Famous poets, writers, politicians, actors, and everyday people, sending letters back and forth with another person, exchanging thoughts and ideas, hopes and dreams, and also love. This is one form of a Virtual Relationship.

It is often the case that the person who is closest in your heart and mind isn't a person who is in the same room.

Second Life is a Virtual World, another existence. Yes, some people do treat it like a game, others consider it a game, and even more dismiss it as make-believe. It is not make-believe. It is just another form of Virtual Communication and Relationship. It is a Second Life you can exist in alongside your first life.

    Yes, I am younger in my Second Life than I am in my First Life. I am younger, healthier, slimmer, and have more hair in Second Life. That is true. It is, after all my Second chance at Life. There are many debates concerning the differences between the virtual and the actual, and those too have value, but for me it boils down to the old saying, "You are as young as you feel."

    My actual body is not young, but I feel young in my mind and soul. And while that is a truth of my life, it is almost impossible to actualize it in my first life. My body, endurance, health, and age doesn't allow me to enjoy the potential of that. In my Second Life, however, I can and do use all of the potentials and ability of that youthful mind.

John O'Donohue was an Irish poet, author, priest, and Hegelian philosopher. He wrote this most quotable quote [From Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom]:

"You are as young as you feel. If you begin to feel the warmth of your soul, there will be a youthfulness in you that no one will be able to take away from you."

     No one will be able to take away from you, yes, but they WILL try to. And the one who will try most often is yourself, if you allow it, and pay heed to those other people. They will continually talk about how you need to "get real" and live in the real world. They will say this after posting something on Facebook, or hanging up a video call, and then turning on the television while also adjusting the fit of their adult diapers.

    

They will sit there scoffing at your Second Life, while shifting around in their own piss and poo, telling you that you need to get real. Well, that real life isn't for me. Sitting through an entire TV series on Netflix while not having to get up to go to the bathroom, that really isn't for me.

I will live my Virtual Life and Love Life and enjoy it.

Life is a game, be it actual or virtual. All life these days is virtual to some extent. It is how you live it that matters. I live it well in both worlds, as much as I am able to, and for as long as I am able to.

I will not waste either chance at life, even though I know that all life is transitory - both the first, second - And beyond.

The Dance of the Toiletries

    When I was younger, I remember seeing many television shows and movies where you see the dad or granddad heading towards the bathroom with a newspaper under the arm, him saying or suggesting that "This will take a while."

    We laughed about it, of course. Our brains filled in the details, sometimes with the idea that his bowel movement would be a big one, or that he just wanted privacy to read his newspaper, or whatever our young brains decided to fill in for us. We smiled or laughed or chuckled. It was almost always humorous.

    Little did we know that the reality is not so funny. It is still a laugh to me, of course. But at the ripe age of 57 I have come to learn that body functions do not work as once they did, and certainly not as fast or smooth, or even as uncomplicated.

      I finally realized why those men in the shows and in the movies were going in for that "long sit". It is simply that quick trips to the bathroom are not always possible after you've passed a certain age. Sometimes you discover that after you've finishing peeing and are washing your hands, you have to go pee again. You learn that it isn't always over, until it is actually over.

    You will also learn with age that things are even slower to process on the other side: You need to sit, and wait for things to move, and then move again, and drip and drain, and eventually close up shop. Once everything has closed up, you can clean yourself down there and head for the sink to wash your hands. It comes as a complete surprise to you when you discover that you wiped far too early, because neither the inner sphincter or outer sphincter are done doing their jobs yet, and the rectum is still in the process of locking the back door.

    It is not simply solid waste that you must be mindful of, it is also gas and fluid and what can feel like oil but is really a type of mucus or pus. Rectal discharge is any substance, aside from feces, that comes out of your rectum. Your rectum is the last part of your digestive system before your anus, which is the opening at the end the system. If you sometimes experience burning and inflamed internal and external hemorrhoids, that might possibly be caused by the anal leakage that kept flowing oily mucus out when you got up before your back door was completely closed and locked.

    If you still have little solid bits and pieces, and slow-moving gas and fluids remaining in the lower end of the gastrointestinal tract, your back door is not done closing. There are tons of nerves down there that detect those almost imperceivable solids and fluids and gases and so it continues to process them out. The lubricants it sends, that can be the oily discharge that makes you feel like you had Indian curry for dinner. When it seeps out on the skin it turns into an irritant that inflames everything. I believe that, for a great many people, it is the reason they have inflamed hemorrhoids: They left the back door ajar.

If you interrupt the back door closing because you believe it is done closing, standing up and going about your day, a lot of things will continue seeping out for much longer than it would have if you just had remained on the toilet to complete the process. You have to be sure it is completely, and I do mean completely, over and done with. You might have to get your hands dirty, or at least a finger or two, but you have to make sure the anus is fully closed up. If it doesn't feel tightly closed, it isn't done yet. Sit and wait. Then finger yourself again to be certain and if you are you can then proceed to mop up the floor around the back door. Give the door a good cleaning as well. It might be a little dirty from the exposure to the elements.

***

    Slang imagery can be overused. I have just made an example of that in the above sentences. I will later claim that I did it on purpose, but that will be a lie. *chuckle*

      I don't take a newspaper or magazine into the bathroom with me. I focus on the task at hand, or even sometimes brush my teeth, or let the toothpaste swish around in my mouth for those long minutes to assist in loosening up the plaque and tar-tar while I am also waiting for other things to loosen up.

    Hey! I have a good idea, especially if you are constipated: If you take your smartphone or tablet computer or Kindle in when you sit down on the toilet to evacuate your bowels, tune into Facebook and find that friend who posts things that upset or bother you, and you won't have to strain to push anything out. Just read that person's timeline. It will come naturally.

What I have learned with age is that sometimes you just have to sit down and wait it out. It is not as quick or as smooth or as problem free as when I was young, but things do still work, they just work themselves out slower. It is a chore, a task, a dirty job that someone has to do. I can't really ask someone else to do it for me.

Well, not for free. ;P